A Review on the Humble Pinecone

They say that the Apple does not fall Far from the Tree. They are Wrong because the Pinecone is not an Apple, it is a Pinecone (which is not an Apple). But if they were to say the Pinecone does not fall Far from the Tree, they would still be Wrong, because Pinecones fall from Pines, and not from Trees (Trees are not Pines, this is the Truth). Although the Pinecone is certainly not Conical in Shape, it is indeed Pine-ical in Shape indeed, but just Browner and Smaller and less Pinier. Although Pinecones do not taste Good (Apples do), Pine Trees love to eat Pinecones, and this is True because if you leave a Pinecone Alone for Several Years (Many) you will find (Eventually) that a Pine Tree has taken its Place, because it saw the Pinecone and it said it was Yummy and it went over there to eat the Pinecone. The Pine Tree then releases more Pinecones for more Pine Trees to enjoy and dine upon. The Pinecone is what brings all Pine Trees Together, and is therefore the Ultimate Symbol of Companionship (Com-pine-ionship). It still tastes Very Bad. Yucky.

3/5 Stars.