I’m really sorry you feel so shit right now, those feelings of disconnection and a cut off from what was reality is quite common. As we get older we deal with more problems, for me personally I had gone from going to school every day having my parents drop me off to eventually due to COVID having to start college, sort out driving lessons, finding a job, considering and setting up my career and even now I’m stuck having to deal with a multitude of annoying factors like these that I’m not always fully prepared for.

The best thing to do with stereotypes and the feeling that as you grow older you lose more of your life is to realise that it is just a change, being younger feels good and we have a lot of attention but as we grow older it gives us the opportunity to live our lives more and experience what comes next, it’s not always nice and everyone tells you otherwise but realistically if you were to commit suicide it would only be in part to the fact that you feel a certain way despite your reality actually being better than what you think it is.

It might seem like:

1. Your life has no meaning but you’re practically just beginning it, truly it is just a strange and painful stage.

2. People treating you differently because you are a teenager, this is just a bullshit problem all teenagers face, you just got to ignore the stereotypes and live your life and by doing so you are proving them wrong but even if they are right sometimes don’t worry about it.

3. Your parents spending less time with you, this is harder for me to address as I don’t know your family dynamics so all I’ll say is that you got to address it with them and make sure they now you feel shit about it, no shame in feeling disconnected from the people you love.

I like to imagine depression and suicidal thoughts in the sense that they’re just a set of emotions and conditions that have accumulated at a poor time, killing myself wouldn’t help anything even though it’s made out to be, we regularly experience emotions and in many ways it’s good we feel this bad as well as it gives us room to grow as individuals and move on from the hardships we face. Reflection and considering your reality is very important, it’s highly underplayed but I’m telling you as soon as you really question what’s going on you’ll feel on top of the world because while other people are dealing with certain problems, you’ve already thought about what it all links back to, cutting off the problem from the source moreorless.

Have faith in yourself and your life and never forget how valued your life is, it’s only beginning and you have so much to experience yet, suicide would just be a waste of that and generally has no need.