you want? here: Dumb Administrator HIDEOUS SEAN BRYRNE is arguing with Idiotic being poop LOOSER OMEGA SEAN POOP-HAIR. SEAN tries to hug OMEGA SEAN but he shakes him off.

SEAN
Please Omega Sean, don’t leave me.
OMEGA SEAN
I’m sorry Sean, but I’m looking for somebody a bit more brave. Somebody who faces his fears head on, instead of running away.
SEAN
I am such a person!
OMEGA SEAN frowns.

OMEGA SEAN
I’m sorry, Sean. I just don’t feel excited by this relationship anymore.
OMEGA SEAN leaves.

SEAN sits down, looking defeated.

Moments later, easy to beat making stickfigs with scarves STOOPID SEAN SUPPORTER 21 barges in looking flustered.

SEAN
Goodness, Sean Supporter! Is everything okay?
SEAN SUPPORTER
I’m afraid not.
SEAN
What is it? Don’t keep me in suspense…
SEAN SUPPORTER
It’s … a rubarb … I saw an evil rubarb injure a bunch of Demons!
SEAN
Defenseless Demons?
SEAN SUPPORTER
Yes, defenseless Demons!
SEAN
Bloomin’ heck, Sean Supporter! We’ve got to do something.
SEAN SUPPORTER
I agree, but I wouldn’t know where to start.
SEAN
You can start by telling me where this happened.
SEAN SUPPORTER
I was…
SEAN SUPPORTER fans himself and begins to wheeze.

SEAN
Focus Sean Supporter, focus! Where did it happen?
SEAN SUPPORTER
Kings Cross Station! That’s right – Kings Cross Station!
SEAN springs up and begins to run.

EXT. A ROAD – CONTINUOUS

SEAN rushes along the street, followed by SEAN SUPPORTER. They take a short cut through some back gardens, jumping fences along the way.

INT. KINGS CROSS STATION – SHORTLY AFTER

ROUX an Evil rubarb terrorises two Demons.

SEAN, closely followed by SEAN SUPPORTER, rushes towards ROUX, but suddenly stops in his tracks.

SEAN SUPPORTER
What is is? What’s the matter?
SEAN
That’s not just any old rubarb, that’s Roux !
SEAN SUPPORTER
Who’s Roux ?
SEAN
Who’s Roux ? Who’s Roux ? Only the most Evil rubarb in the universe!
SEAN SUPPORTER
Blinkin’ knickers, Sean! We’re going to need some help if we’re going to stop the most Evil rubarb in the universe!
SEAN
You can say that again.
SEAN SUPPORTER
Blinkin’ knickers, Sean! We’re going to need some help if we’re going to stop the most Evil rubarb in the universe!
SEAN
I’m going to need ice shards, lots of ice shards.
Roux turns and sees Sean and Sean Supporter. He grins an evil grin.

ROUX
Sean Bryrne, we meet again.
SEAN SUPPORTER
You’ve met?
SEAN
Yes. It was a long, long time ago…

EXT. A PARK – BACK IN TIME

A young SEAN is sitting in a park listening to some rock music, when suddenly a dark shadow casts over him.

He looks up and sees ROUX. He takes off his headphones.

ROUX
Would you like some honey?
SEAN’s eyes light up, but then he studies ROUX more closely, and looks uneasy.

SEAN
I don’t know, you look kind of Evil.
ROUX
Me? No. I’m not Evil. I’m the least Evil rubarb in the world.
SEAN
Wait, you’re a rubarb?
SEAN runs away, screaming.

INT. KINGS CROSS STATION – PRESENT DAY

ROUX
You were a coward then, and you are a coward now.
SEAN SUPPORTER
(To SEAN) You ran away?
SEAN
(To SEAN SUPPORTER) I was a young child. What was I supposed to do?
SEAN turns to ROUX.

SEAN
I may have run away from you then, but I won’t run away this time!
SEAN runs away.

He turns back and shouts.

SEAN
I mean, I am running away, but I’ll be back – with ice shards.
ROUX
I’m not scared of you.
SEAN
You should be.

EXT. CHIPPEWA SQUARE – LATER THAT DAY

SEAN and SEAN SUPPORTER walk around searching for something.

SEAN
I feel sure I left my ice shards somewhere around here.
SEAN SUPPORTER
Are you sure? It does seem like an odd place to keep deadly ice shards.
SEAN
You know nothing Sean Supporter 21.
SEAN SUPPORTER
We’ve been searching for ages. I really don’t think they’re here.
Suddenly, ROUX appears, holding a pair of ice shards.

ROUX
Looking for something?
SEAN SUPPORTER
Crikey, Sean, he’s got your ice shards.
SEAN
Tell me something I don’t already know!
SEAN SUPPORTER
The earth’s circumference at the equator is about 40,075 km.
SEAN
I know that already!
SEAN SUPPORTER
I HATE DOGE.
ROUX
(appalled) Dude!
While ROUX is looking at SEAN SUPPORTER with disgust, SEAN lunges forward and grabs his deadly ice shards. He wields them, triumphantly.

SEAN
Prepare to die, you Evil parsnip!
ROUX
No please! All I did was injure a bunch of Demons!
OMEGA SEAN enters, unseen by any of the others.

SEAN
I cannot tolerate that kind of behaviour! Those Demons were defenceless! Well now they have a defender – and that’s me! Sean Bryrne defender of innocent Demons.
ROUX
Don’t hurt me! Please!
SEAN
Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t use these ice shards on you right away!
ROUX
Because Sean, I am your father.
SEAN looks stunned for a few moments, but then collects himself.

SEAN
No you’re not!
ROUX
Ah well, it had to be worth a try.
ROUX tries to grab the ice shards but SEAN dodges out of the way.

SEAN
Who’s the daddy now? Huh? Huh?
Unexpectedly, ROUX slumps to the ground.

SEAN SUPPORTER
Did he just faint?
SEAN
I think so.…[Read more]

*takes up all air* here we go! Diary of a wimpy kid: The Heffley family – Greg (Jason Drucker), Rodrick (Charlie Wright), Frank (Tom Everett Scott), Susan (Alicia Silverstone), and Manny (Dylan and Wyatt Walters) – plus Rowley (Owen Asztalos) arrive at Corny’s, a family-friendly restaurant that Greg thinks is for babies. At the table, Greg and Rowley watch a video of their idol, internet celebrity Mac Digby (Joshua Hoover), whom Susan considers a bad influence. Manny then gets stuck in the tube maze above the ball pit, which means Greg must go get him. He gets bombarded by other smaller kids and then loses Manny in the ball pit. Greg scrambles to find him but then ends up getting a dirty diaper stuck to his hands. As he tries to shake the diaper off, other kids and adults start laughing and recording Greg on their phones.

Greg becomes a viral sensation known as “Diaper Hands”, which has left him humiliated. He finds out that Mac is going to be at a video game convention, Player Expo. Since the Heffleys are heading on a road trip for their Meemaw’s 90th birthday, Greg tries to find a way to get to Player Expo and take a video with Mac so that everyone can forget about Diaper Hands.

The Heffleys pack up for their road trip, but their van becomes cluttered with so much luggage that Frank considers flying. Not wanting to miss the convention, Greg suggests putting all their luggage in Frank’s boat so that they’ll have space and possibly get the boat on the water.

As the family hits the road, Susan forces her sons to give up their phones so that they can have a “disconnected” family vacation free of electronics. Greg and Rodrick reluctantly hand over their phones. She also makes them eat healthy snacks instead of stopping to eat something. For fun, Susan pulls out a card game where people confess to things. It takes a real turn when Greg uses something he knows Rodrick did and makes him admit it. Frank and Susan follow suit and make Rodrick admit to other naughty things he’s done, then forcing him to apologize on the phone to their neighbor whose house he TP’d a while back. Rodrick shoots Greg a death glare and promises to get him back.

The family passes by a grocery store and drops Greg and Rodrick so they don’t wake Manny from his nap (because that would be really bad). Instead of sticking to Susan’s list of healthy junk, Rodrick grabs a bunch of sugary junk.

The Heffleys stop at a crummy motel for the night. The boys want to use the pool but find that it has been drained. All that’s left is a hot tub which is being occupied by a family that Greg refers to as “the Beardos” (because the dad has a big beard). Later that night, the family leaves the hot tub, so the brothers go for a dip. Greg has taken his phone, and Rodrick finds out. He goes to tell on Greg as payback for the card game. Greg tries to get out but accidentally pulls a bag of cheese puffs into the hot tub, turning him orange. He then tells Rodrick about the Player Expo and how he may have a chance to earn a cash prize to fix his van and maybe even meet hot girls in cosplay. Rodrick agrees to join Greg.

When Greg goes back to his room, he finds Frank using his computer to do work stuff. They agree to keep their electronics use a secret from Susan to not upset her. Greg then tries to go to bed but has no room on the couch or bed. He goes to sleep in the closet but then hears a banging noise from outside. Greg steps out the room and finds the Beardo kids making noise as they’ve stolen a snack cart. Greg tells them to be quiet but the kids push the cart at him. The cart hits the Beardo family’s van, just as Mr. Beardo (Chris Coppola) steps out. He freaks out when the cart scratches the van, and his daughter pins the blame on Greg. Greg runs away until the coast is clear so he can return to his room. In the morning, he realizes he walked into the Beardos’ room and slept next to Mr. Beardo. He runs out and back to his room.

The Heffleys go back on the road and stop at a country fair. Greg and Rodrick eat deep-fried butter on a stick, but Greg sees the Beardo family walking around. He runs and ends up having to take Manny while Frank makes a business call. The boys come across a game where they must guess the weight of a pig in exchange for a lollipop. Manny manages to guess the exact weight of the pig and earns a small piglet as a prize. Greg says they can’t keep it for reasons that unintentionally insult the farm folks in that area, so the boys leave. Greg and Mr. Beardo spot each other, so Greg gives Manny the piglet and runs again. Greg and Rodrick go on a Gravitron, after Rodrick has eaten his 9th butter stick. Mr. Beardo follows Greg in there as the ride starts up. Greg climbs over some kids while Beardo tries to reach him. Beardo presses on Rodrick’s stomach, causing Rodrick to blow chunks that fly into Beardo’s face (and mouth). The boys run and find the rest of their family, which leads to Susan finding out about Frank and Greg…[Read more]