I’m just tired, really tired of it. I work hard and put time and effort into my work but do I get anything out of it? No, I don’t and it pains me, it pains me when I’m part of a group for a long time and I do something wrong and suddenly I’m the bad guy. Meanwhile someone can join that group and suddenly they’re a part of it’s icon. I change myself so much so I can fit in that I don’t even know who I am anymore. I stay up, working so just maybe, just maybe… I’ll finally get somewhere closer to my goal but sometimes it just feels like it’s for nothing. Irl, I’m barely even noticed in my group of friends. I’m probably being selfish, just wanting at least some recognition… I’m probably just saying this for attention or something like that. Hell, if I posted this in another server, I’ll get told I’m doing this for attention since my role got revoked. I’ll get told that I’m no special flower but just for once I wish I was… I just want to make people happy and I guess I can barely do that, that’s why I change my personality or stay up, so I can try to get more popular so I can spread my messages even more. I don’t even know who I am or what I am even doing anymore, I don’t know if my actions are for selfish needs or not. Guess we’ll find out some day