Today’s trend is…
Hm? Hang on, I’m receiving a transmission from Trendsetters™️ HQ.
I see…
There doesn’t seem to be a trend today, odd.

In other news, casualties continue to build up for the “Touching Grass Challenge”, now reaching the thousands 24 hours later. Governments worldwide are urging civilians to stay inside until the biohazardous grass is neutralised.

"Siphon"
Age: Unknown (Looks about 50)
Height: 5ft
IQ: 200+ (Also insane)
Smells like: Musty blankets and Electricity

Life Hack: If he’s chasing you, distract him with chocolate-chip cookies.

Siphon is a genius engineer directing an underground syndicate of scientists and mechanics. He names it the Serpent’s Coil Forge. Mono and CHR0-M3 frequent his subterranean facility to upgrade their equipment, try out new ones, fix up Mono’s armour, or beg Siphon to manufacture them a badass motorcycle. He has yet to deliver.
Siphon may look like a normal person, but less than 20% of him is organic material with the rest being completely mechanical. He can transform parts of his body into various mechanisms but prefers making miniguns out of his arms.
Siphon is not sane. He’s by no means an inherently malicious individual but also has no care for the safety of himself or the people around him. He frequently dives into extreme experiments and situations purely for the thrill or knowledge he can gain from them. Otherwise, he’s quite amicable and makes for entertaining conversation if you haven’t yet landed on his list of people to kill.
He apparently holds bad blood with Dr Chi’Mera, and bringing him up either puts Siphon into a rageful incoherent babble, or a grave silence. They were supposedly colleagues and friends at one point. If true, that era is long gone.
Having already been implied, Siphon is an ally for Mono and CHR0-M3, aiding them in their battles with his unique equipment and genius designs. The motorcycle idea has been put on hold, but something may come out of it soon.